Thrifty Party Planning

We left the caterer’s office pale and trembling. We both needed a drink after receiving the estimated cost of the party we wanted to throw for my in-laws’ fiftieth wedding anniversary. Unfortunately, we don’t drink. So we settled for coffee cake and Starbucks, trying to quell our anxiety with—coffee.
“What are they, crazy?” my husband wondered aloud.
“Maybe the chicken fricassee will be served on fourteen carat gold plates,” I said.
“What in the world is chicken fricassee anyway? What part of the chicken is that?”
The caterer’s estimate was for many thousands of dollars and didn’t include the entertainment, flowers or any liquor we might want to serve. There had to be a better way, we agreed, to host fifty of our parent’s friends for an elegant evening.
The key here was elegant evening. We though about having it at home. The problem with that was that our home’s décor, which could best be described as, “early childhood”, didn’t seem to lend itself to elegant evening. Still, we wondered, with a little attention to detail, couldn’t we make our guests so very comfortable and happy that the party would be, if not completely elegant, than memorable and fun?
To that end we considered how best to host a party with lots of “wow” factor and still save money. Some of these ideas and tips can be modified for entertaining, or for celebration. For convenience’s sake, I’ll address each area of party planning in its category.

1. The Setting:
Free is good when it comes to settings. A party at home has a certain warmth and friendliness that is unparalleled. But you can easily go crazy once it hits you that your home is going to be viewed by lots of people. The late Erma Bombeck once wrote about her mistake in ironing a lone handkerchief she’d found under a coffee table. By the end of the week the coffee table had been replaced, the laundry room redone and I think the article closed with her scraping wallpaper from the living room walls. So if you think inviting people home will have you spending thousands on decorating, consider other good places like: your parent’s home, a wealthy friend’s home, parks which, when reserved in advance can be had for a small fee, yours or a friend’s condominium party room, or a conference room at a local business hotel.


2. Fire and Flowers
Once you have your setting, follow the advice of Judith Martin, aka Miss Manners.
She advises that the key to any party is flowers and fire. Literally this means to scatter candles or torches about and fling flowers wherever you can. Figuratively, she explains that it’s good to invite people who are in love and flowery, as well as people who might not see eye to eye on things-and there’s your fire.
For our garden party we bought simple wicker torches at the Home Depot but supplemented with torches and candles purchased at Smart and Final, an odd lots store that caters to smaller restaurants. Dollar stores had all the candles we could want, at a fraction of the price charged by upscale stores.
There is an almost obscene difference in flower prices depending on where you live in the country. The same roses that I can buy on a street corner in Miami (where, admittedly, you can buy all sorts of things at a discount-many of them narcotics) will cost literally ten times more if purchased in Baltimore. For the frugal minded flowers represent the worst sort of waste and indulgence. So they go to great lengths to substitute. I’ve attended parties where people tried to save money by making centerpieces out of Styrofoam and plastic thingies. The effect was trailer- park- meets –Toucan- Sam- from- the- frootloops- box, and it just looked sad. I agree with the party divas when they insist on flowers. But how to save? How? How?
Flower shops don’t sell discount “day old” in our area and they looked at us like we were panhandling when we asked. (I’d do that over the phone next time). I had already called our regular florist to just order up the arrangements when my frugal friend Debbie threw herself in front of my credit card screaming noooo. Her brave display was touching but she had real info. There was a new flower place and it sold orchids. She had asked and they would, at no charge, make an arrangement for you using orchids and your own container. Older orchids were a third of the cost.
Moral of the story: new stores are anxious to get you for a customer and are open to these suggestions. Older flowers are less expensive, despite the sneers and jeers of some stores it seems, so go ahead and ask.
My friend disclosed that she had picked up free flower arrangements from the catering hall in her area the day before her last party. She called a week before and explained that she was cost conscious, but wanted flowers for her party. The caterer, like most people in the entertainment industry, respected her honesty. She offered to pay a small fee for left over flowers. He confided that he just throws them away once the party is over. Early Sunday morning found her at the catering hall, carting away gorgeous arrangements only hours old.
If you do end up using a florist though, there is one frugal way to get more for your money. After the party, take the flowers to your local hospital or nursing home and have your children deliver them to residents or recuperating patients. The pleasure you’ll give and the lesson imparted: priceless.